- Ah Beng bought a Honda VTI recently and drove to Ah Lian's place to show it to her. So there Ah Beng was bragging the various functions of his new car to his girlfriend. 'This is ah, so fast even the Mata Chia cannot catch ah!' 'Ha! Really ah!!! Steady lah!' said Ah Lian. 'Some more hor, this is Automatic one, vely easy to drive!' So Ah Lian said, 'Let me try! I wan, I wan!' So Ah Lian took the driver's seat and shifted the gear and floored the accelerator. The next moment, the car sped backwards and crashed into the lamp-post. 'Alamak! What u doing? U Siao Char Bo! U see lah! Wah Piang eh!' screamed Ah Beng. 'Solee, solee, pai sah lah! No lah, I tot hor, 'R' for racing mah!'
- 3 recruits - Chinese, Malay & Indian were at the army supply base to collect underwear. The sergeant was there to aid the supplies. Sergeant: Hei Ah Beng! How many underwear you need ah? Ah Beng: (thinks a while) 7 sasen(sergeant)! Sergeant: (puzzled) How come so many? Ah Beng: Mon, Tues, Wed, Thurs, Fri, Sat & Sun. One day one. Sergeant: (Malay recruit) Eh Mat! How many underwear? Mat: (without hesitation) 6 sargen! Sergeant: (curious) How come six? Mat: Mon, Tues, Wed, Thurs, Sat & Sun. Friday I wear sarong. Sergeant: (Indian recruit) Dei Tambi. How many underwears dah dei? Tambi: (very confidently) 12 Sarjen !!!! Sergeant: (shocked & fell to the ground) Why you need so many for? Tambi: January, February, March.....One month one.
- Once upon a time, a group of Ah Bengs stepped into a lounge and wanted the DJ to play the song 'Ah Cheng Buey Ro Ti' (In Hokkien means Ah Cheng buys bread). The DJ told them that they only have English songs and told them to re-select another song. The Ah Bengs were very angry and kicked up a big fuss claiming the DJ was insulting them. The manager had to intervene in order to calm them down. Finally after a long talk with Ah Bengs, the manager found out that they were actually asking for the song 'Unchained Melody' by the Righteous Brothers.
- Santa Singh (remember him?) just graduated from Law school and decided to apply for a job in the most prestigious 'Lee & Lee Law Firm'. During the interview, Mr. Lee KY looked at Santa Singh's resume, thinks for a while and said, 'Well, I would need to discuss your application with my wife.' And went off to discuss Santa's application with his wife. Lee KY's wife said, 'C'mon, don't you know that we only hire lawyers with surnames beginning with 'Lee' only? Of course, we can't hire Santa Singh!' So Lee KY told the bad news to Santa Singh about his rejection. Few days later, Santa Singh came back to the same company and requested for another interview and Lee KY said, 'Look Santa, I have already told you that we only hire.......' When Santa Singh interrupted him and said, 'I know, I know. I have just changed my name.' Lee KY looked at Santa Singh in surprise and asked, 'What is your new name then?' On this, Santa Singh replied, 'Surname Lee, last name, Manga!' (Manga-Li)
5 members become crazy:
haha.. =.="
lol~
dai ga chai chai xiu ...
ha ha haaaa
wah, yuan suddenly got so many 'beng beng lian lian' jokes...
FUNNY =)
lol.. not bad!